When it comes to age differences, 20 years can be a world of difference. I had a feeling this was true however, it became increasingly apparent to me as I conducted interviews of people 20 years and 40 years older than I am. I had a feeling this was true however, it became increasingly apparent to me as I conducted interviews of people 20 years and 40 years older than I am.
People that are 40 years older than I am, whether male or female, seemed to hold more respect for their elders growing up than the 20 years older group. The lady I interviewed described a time where women could have freedom, but it was within a set bracket of “acceptable” guidelines created by men. She was outspoken in her time and often was admonished for her “wild” ways, usually by being spanked with a thick leather belt. Both interviewees’ mothers stayed home to care for the family. The family worked and ate together, and they came to know the importance of quality time with a family because it was modeled to them. The men from this time period acted more respectable towards women and my interviewee was hard pressed to find a time when a hand was ever laid on him in anger.
My interviews conducted of men and women aged 20 years older than I resulted in decreased family time, probably due to both parents having to work. They still found time to spend with one another, usually on vacations they would take about twice a year. One of the things I found most interesting was neither of the 20 year difference interviewees cooked on a regular basis growing up and they only cook about twice a week today. Punishment was less severe with this group; usually no physical beatings were dealt but rather soap would be administered to the mouth or “time outs” would be utilized.
Reflecting on my personal experiences, I work full-time and go to school full-time. The world around me is what I make of it. I tend to hold the opinion that age alone is not enough for me to respect another’s authority over me; I tend to look for some sort of credibility before I trust their judgment. I remember threats of violence as a child, but I never remember a stern follow through from either of my parents. Due to my moving out of my home at the age of 16, I did what I wanted and I had to sleep in the bed that I made for myself. I had many extended loving family members that wanted to speak into my life but rather than listening and allowing mentorship, I took to my own paths. I think it made me stronger however, upon reflection, I think it would have been easier to not be so stubborn.
It's true that the older generation gave more respect towards their elders at such a young age. It truly is sad to see some 20 year olds nowadays not treat their elders as properly as people would have back then. I feel like the values and morals of the younger generation have been compromised so much over the years. Like you said, the men also respected the women better back then and that is not always the case now. It disgusts me to see how me now have become more like animals and disrespect women rather than opening doors for them and being chivalrous like before.
ReplyDeleteWhile reading through your last paragraph, your reflections, I found myself smiling. You seem like an independent, bright person! Honestly, I cannot see myself living independently as a sixteen year old. The workload would be too much for me to handle along with school. Currently, I am seventeen and still live with my parents, and I just cannot imagine washing my own clothes, buying my own groceries and making my own food. But here you are accomplishing this challenge. I admire you for that. Also, I agree with your statement, "The world around me is what I make of it."
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