Guidelines for Communicating in Romantic Relationships

The free write topic that most intrigued me this week was the “Guidelines for Communicating in Romantic Relationships.”  There were four guidelines that Chapter 11 offered including: engraining in dual perspective, practicing safe sex, managing conflict constructively, and adapting communication to maintain long distance relationships.  This section caught my eye for several reasons, mainly the safe sex and constructive conflict sections.  The statistics the book provides regarding safe sex are staggering, including: “One in two sexually active youths will contract an STD by age 25 (pg. 288),” and “One in five people with HIV do not know they have it (pg. 289).”  I know many people that have STDs and like the book suggests, many have acquired them while intoxicated under impaired judgment.  It is very hard seeing what they go through and what they have put their partners through by infecting them.

The constructive conflict management section hit a note for me as well with the statement about how relationships are fragile.  Sometimes you say make a demeaning remark to your partner that you don’t think is a big deal but it could shatter their composure instantly.  Trying to remain patient, using dual perspective, and listening is soooo hard sometimes but it makes it worthwhile when you can better create an environment where you can appreciate your partner and the relationship because you know it is solid, understanding, and safe for both of you to trust and be yourselves.